he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
zippers are such a cool invention
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
