if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
