3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
