My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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