Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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