idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize