so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
