i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize