The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
no you cant smoke seaweed
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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