just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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