Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize