who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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