Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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