just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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