She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
