Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"