I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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