My brain says no but my pants say off.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize