I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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