Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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