is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
