Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Oh god it's open bar.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
