i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
they call him Oral-B. enough said
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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