I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize