So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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