I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
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Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
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No...this little piggys going to the bar
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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