Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize