I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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