just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
