seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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