You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Randomize
