Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the day after is always just damage control
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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