I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
too bad you live with your parents still
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
