How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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