She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize
