I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
