Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize