i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
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