Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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