Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom