Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Green mimosas i think yes
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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