I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.