Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I was not drunk enough for that final.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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