I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
