maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize