your thong is hanging out like whoa
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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