I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize