"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
So apparently I’m into choking now
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