Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize