gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize