Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
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